Happy New Year.

I hope you enjoyed the festivities and have not landed back into dreary January with too much of a bump.

Have you got any New Year Resolutions?

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m not one for resolutions. I joke now that I can’t be arsed, and that’s true, but as a younger woman, I’d set myself up to fail with absolute restrictions – like never eating food again, only to cave, half-starved, by half past three.

These days moderation is more my thing, well, if moderation involves grazing on leftover Cadbury’s Roses and Ferro Roche, – with or without an ambassador.

I’ve decided to be more aware of my screen time. I read an article online (oh, the irony) about the amount of time we spend looking at a screen.

You have one life. Do you really want to spend it looking at your phone? | Smartphones | The Guardian

The writer talks about the addictive nature, not just of social media but our apps. I’d long ago turned off notifications for everything, those little red dots of numbers driving me mad, but the writer went on to talk about the design of apps.

I’d not thought about the colours of things, that the colours of apps were deliberate choices, not just to be aesthetically pleasing but designed to tap into some dopamine hit in my brain.

And before we go on I should say I have nothing against social media and the online world.  An early adopter, and often socially isolated due to ill health, social media has at times been my only connection to the outside world.

I like seeing what colourful outfit my friend is wearing today, marvelling at her bold choices, knowing I would look like a giant clown while she looks quirky and cool.

I love seeing distant friends, families growing, pets and gardens.

There can be a lot of joy on Social Media and I’m lucky that I don’t come across any of the nastier stuff.

What I object to is being controlled by some app or company that thinks it has the right to manipulate how often I choose to interact.

I’m not good at being told what to do, and the thought of some app messing with my dopamine pisses me off.

The article suggested turning your online world black and white.

This was easier said than done. I’d recently switched phones from Apple to Android, and the cognitive strain had almost broken me. After several hours, much swearing, crying, and eating all the ambassador’s favourite chocolates in a medical emergency, I managed to find the greyscale switch.  Suddenly my online world was calm.

The effect was immediate.

Just looking at the screen was easier. Nothing jumped out, slapping me in the face for attention. Nothing screamed Me! Me! Me! as I opened up my phone.

And after a while, the screen seemed, well, boring.

For the life of me, I couldn’t see why I spent so much time on there.

 ‘Ooh I couldn’t do that, I need to check the news,’ one friend said shaking her head.

But do you remember the days when you checked the news at 6 O’clock when it was on the telly, maybe catching a glimpse on the radio on the way to work? We survived then. The world and the news didn’t stop.

And I know we should be informed, but reading all about it several times a day doesn’t help anyone much.

Or at least it doesn’t help me.

Within a few days, my social media and general online use had plummeted. And like the article said, I got back loads of time.

I’ve read more, something I’ve struggled with this last year. I’ve finished nearly three novels already this year.

And I’m saving money, no late-night purchases of books or Vinted hauls. Come to think of it I’m sleeping better too.

The dog hated my phone, belly flopping on me every time I picked it up, demanding ear scratches and two-handed belly rubs. This used to drive me nuts, but I wonder now if he somehow knew something I did not.

So, for now, my screen world is smaller, more selective. (and may be for a while as I cant work out how to put the colour back on!)

The irony of writing this online is not lost on me – I hope that you haven’t given it up too or I am writing this to no one.

But if you are still here, and I would miss you if you weren’t, I hope it’s because you chose to, not because of some flashing dot messing with your dopamine.

And before we get carried away with the caring propensities of the dog, don’t worry, he’s still a dick, he just likes to belly flop on my book now.